Those Fucking Snowflakes – ‘Everything is Absolutely Fkkkkkkd’ EP review

Blackpool’s finest, Those Fucking Snowflakes, have signed to Louder Than War records and are all set to release their new EP, ‘Everything is Absolutely Fkkkkkkd’, on 22 January on limited 10″ yellow vinyl. The band have always been against the contempt our leaders treat so many of us with but the events of 2020 ensured there’s even more to be angry about…

‘Uncooperative Crusties’ opens the EP with its views on how certain people get their priorities wrong when it comes to environmental issues. A slow-burning, stop-start Meat Wave-esque build-up with plenty of scuzzy bass makes way to the band’s passionate please of ‘Stop!’ as they chant about how the Earth is slowly dying. This is swiftly followed by the more melodic, synth-pop influenced ‘Due Some Terrible End’. The band declare ‘We are the hopeful Left with ideals’ but seem resigned to the hopelessness of wanting a fairer society – ‘People are equal no matter what – gender, race, sexuality’ – in the current climate. They then tackle the narcissistic nature of people who choose to be a white racist on ‘White Isn’t Right’ – it’s a passionate and furious rally against those who feel living in a diverse society where everyone should be treated equally is somehow unfair on their white privilege. We feel it’s also a gloriously messy math rock piece against those misinformed types who choose to ignore the values and message of BLM. It’s the new ‘Nazi Punks fuck off’.

For all their talk of ‘levelling up’ and being ‘one nation’, the current UK government have certainly used the pandemic as an excuse to further divide the country – just look at the treatment of Andy Burnham and Manchester compared to London and the South East and those schools that were threatened with legal action for daring to close a couple of days before their Christmas break in the interest of public safety. It was more apparent than ever when former Chief Ghoul Dominic Cummings broke the guidance during the first lockdown and subsequently went on his eyesight-testing car trip. Opening with a blast of killer hooks and the message these Tories are desperate to give to joe public (‘Know your place’), ‘By the Power of Barnard Castle’ examines how they managed to profit off a pandemic and how they put us at all at risk with their dangerously early ‘back to work’ (in the office) messaging: ‘Their rules apply to us but not to them… Their rules apply to all unless you have wealth’.

The penultimate ‘Caudrilla Can Fuck Right Off’ falls somewhere between The Bronx and Placebo with its crunching riffs and black humour – both the word ‘death’ and ‘we’re fucked’ are repeated over and over again, while ‘Mendacious Meddling Milkshake Recipient’ takes you back to a simpler time when people threw dairy-based drinks over racists. It’s a fractitious, furious and fantastic finish to an EP that rallies against the rise of fascism in the UK.

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